Baby Boomers Turn 60

And Paul McCartney officially sold out. We all knew it was going to happen. No, not the bit on Sir Paul. Rather, Baby Boomers were gonna get old sooner or later, and the resources of our collective marketing machine were going to be focused on more conservative, plan-to-party-before-you-die type things like retirement accounts and viagra. If you wanna get rich, invest 10 years ahead of a generation, and wait for the demand to catch up. I mean, I bet Depends diapers for adults is pretty cheap stock right now.

But seriously folks. If the Baby Boomers had one thing going for them, it was their awe-inspiring neo-spiritualist movement. There was an awakening, a collective search for humanitarian roots which rebelled against the poisons of ominous corporate rule. They were resourceful enough to use the tentacles of mass-media to spread the message. Folk/Pop/Anthem music was healthy, fresh, virile, and above all, readily available for consumption. Included in this army of honest souls were The Doors, The Birds, Bob Dylan, and of course, The Beatles. Now, I'm not going to say that the Beatles achieved the most honest, in your face, get up and see the world yourself you lazy, brainwashed, product of military-industrial complex mommies. But I would venture to say that next to the military, The Beatles were the most successful deliverers of a universal message. I didn't live during their time, yet even two generations later, I am greatly impressed with their influence. Once the Beatles hit it big, I'm sure most people felt a sense of relief, believing that we had the closest thing to leaders who could not be bought. I recently read that Sir Paul is worth a sum of $1.5 billion. So tell me, please, someone, why is Paul doing commercials for Fidelity investments? Does he really care about my IRA? Does he even have an IRA? Or are old age and money really the two things we can count on to shrivel the idealist streak in us all.

Please, Paul, tell me you're saving up for a giant air filter, designed to take us back to pre-1930 levels of air pollution. Or maybe this will all go to the McCartney prize, awarded to the developer of the best plan to keep the human population in check while still saving children from starvation and disease.

Oh Paul. When I'm 64, indeed.